Wazobia Special Baby Boy ...

How does my heart delight in knowing my darling ex and his new wife have welcomed a healthy, precious baby boy while I question WHY! WHY couldn't OUR babies be born healthy and whole???? Am I selfish? Am I insincere? I know I'm not. I prayed thanking God for seeing baby and Mommy through a safe birth and asked God to continuously bless them all. But here I am, a day later after his birth, crying angrily that our little ones weren't afforded being fawned over, fussed over, adored, loved, and smothered with our affection. I don't even know what to write...my thoughts are scattered. I'm half smiling because I know the joy my ex must feel; and I'm crying because I can't explain why I, too, don't know such joy. Ugh... Well, what I know is that little baby boy's siblings who are in heaven are sending their love to their brother. Wazobia is a word Nigerians use to say "Welcome"; it's a combination of three Nigerian languages all meaning 'welcome'.