Clear view through a tidal wave of emotions...

During a conversation with a friend earlier, he explained I hadn't 'just' found my life's purpose as I had just told him; it was already there he suggested. I have now stepped into it. This is what Oprah Winfrey calls an 'Aha' moment; I get it! I will give birth to a new language or new conversation by which society speaks to and about women/families who have lost an expected life. Let me say this, when I think I'm able to be generous, to use other people's words, and share my story and healing with the world, without the onslaught of tears, self doubt, profound sadness, and bewilderment, I realize how equally fragile and resilient we are. I see that in myself. I didn't expect today's tidal wave of emotions. They washed over me like I imagine being dunked in a carnival target game. (The ones where you knowingly sit in an enclosed pool atop water on a collapsible stool, waiting for someone to hit the target that plummets you into the water. Well, I KNOW I've experienced these losses of my little ones, and I KNOW life has gone on, but I never KNOW when someone, some thought, or some image of what I anticipate either Jade, Rohan or Zen to resemble in their earthly forms will trigger or target these emotions.) Suffice it to say, I can see my way through the tears to blog...from day one, this was my salvation. This has been my therapy, my way of sharing. I'm grateful this community allows me to share my experiences and in doing so I hope you see hope for yourself too. Always with love, Me...Jade, Rohan and Zen's Mom xoxo