Some have heads, but have no cap...while others have caps but have no heads....

If I knew how to write in Yoruba, a Nigerian language, I could better explain the above proverb. Essentially, at it relates to the issue of pregnancy and the ability to be a parent, it means that someone may have the ability to bear a child, but may not be capable to caring for him/her; while another can have all the heart to be a parent, but not be able to conceive or carry to term.

Perhaps I've been stubborn, proud and a bit narrow-minded. Or, perhaps I just want my own flesh and blood! No harm, right? But today something struck me...what is really most important to me? The actual joy of motherhood, or conquering the road to that Olympic feat? Lord knows I've been through enough medical 'boot camp', but still no reward.

There's no harm in researching adoption...I hope a better understanding of the process and some real faith in God will allay my fears. I know that this life is not perfect; we are all living examples of imperfection. It's worth the research...

Still chasing motherhood...